My Breakdown

After two years of fighting, my mind fell into depression.  I didn’t realize how a metal illness can suck the life out of you. It was a battle I had to face because I couldn’t function anymore. I did the bare minimum to keep afloat. I didn’t care about anything, I had no joy  anymore. I would wake up to take kids to school and go back to sleep until it was time to pick them up. I stopped socializing with my family and just wanted to be left alone in my room.

My husband finally told me that I needed to go the hospital because he can see that I needed professional help. I didn’t want to argue so I went. I had lost the biggest battle and I just felt like a failure in life. I hated him, I was being forced to be in a marriage that I hated. The hospital kept me overnight because there was no psychiatrist available until the morning.

I was scared. I was given a small room with my bed but everyone else was in this big room laying in recliners. Was I going crazy? Did they keep me because they feel that I’m a danger to myself? All these thoughts were going through my head.

to be continued……

 

photo credit: https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.crosswalk.com/family/parenting/teens/when-we-break-our-promises.html%3Famp%3D1

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